Dear JD,

I am so so sorry. I know I broke your heart and it rips me apart to this day knowing that I hurt you. I am so sorry I had to be selfish. I knew you were going to propose and it all came to me that I did not like where I was in life. I'm 23, no experience, nothing lived and nothing done. I love you so much but I also love myself so much more. My reasons may never seem justifyable to anyone but myself. I know what I feel and I know that if I didnt leave you I would regret it and I would settle for a life I may not want. I would rather regret trying to get something than regret never ever trying. I think about you everyday and my heart breaks everytime.

You gave back everything i gave to you after our breakup and that hurt me. I gave you peices of myself, proof of my love and shared experiences. I know you can dictate how a person chooses to get over a situation but i just thooguht you a least valued what we had somewhat, that even if we werent together anymore we could look back on the past 3 years and cherish the beautiful memories we made. I had a car accident after we broke up and I wanted to call you so bad but I didnt know if you cared. That thought crossing my mind was the worst thing in my life because at one point my entire world started and ended with you. I'm not sure what else is out there and every now and again I wonder if I made a mistake. I hope I didn't and there is truly more to this life.