Dear O.P,

Thankfully, I'm over it. It feels like a fever dream when I think about I. It's been over 7 months since i've seen you. And it feels so stupid and pointless to still think about it, because it was nothing. For me of course, it was something but I will never know how you felt about all of it. Honestly I think you laughed about it with your friends, and maybe I deserved it. It took me a long time to realize that I was actually the problem and that it was my fault. I was so naive, selfish and scared. But I didn't know better back then. So, I'm also very grateful for the experience. The whole situation altered my brain chemistry, changed my view on human connection and made me a better person. I wish I could apologise for my stupid actions and my lack of communication. At the same time you should not have dragged me along and instead just told me that you don't want to see mee anymore. I understand that people change their minds and it's completely acceptable, but communication your feelings honestly is everyones' responsibility. But you didn't do that. You left me confused yet hopeful which destroyed me, knowing you had no respect for me. I just don't understand why you couldn't give me an explanation. You could have simply sent me a message saying "It's been fun, but I don't see this going any forward". Instead you said "See you", and for some reason I believed it. For such a long time I had this hope that you would show me some kind of a sign that you still care about me. Obviously you didn't. You forgot about me the second we said goodbye. And what makes me sad is that you never saw the real me. You didnt know how sad and guilty I felt after you. I don't cry anymore and sometimes it even feels even funny to think about how much I cried over a boy who didn't give a fuck about me. But again, I have only have my self to blame; I made the choices that I made, and I'm responsible for the consequences. And even though you did me wrong, I still like you, think youre a wonderful person and I wish you all the best. Maybe you were also scared, and that's why you couldn't be honest.. And I always knew it wouldn't last, so I don't know what I was hoping for.