Dear Nobody™,

i don't know where to start, I hate to admit it but i honestly rather be dead then have to live another day. Uh the thought of suicide recurring thought i know that people care and love me. I just i can't find a way to love myself i know I'll never commit but the thoughts they haunt me they eat at me they destroy me. Yet im still the loudest funniest person you'll ever meet yet i go to work and school with a smile on my face making everyone else day better. But my own i'm sorry to everyone who i've ever brought down with my "sadness" or "depression" as the world labels it. To me i just feel like it's a big black hole that just eats away and away at you and never ends. It may shrink or grow but there is no cure it feels as if i'm stuck just getting my ass beat by life. I hope if anyone actually reads this GET the help you need people care so deeply about you and love you even more. If they don't express take it from the person who has the thoughts of just leaving this world forever on their mind 24/7. Just know help is here and if it's reaching out grab it and never let go.