Dear no longer just a far acquaintance, I think,

Do I care?
I'd like to claim I don't. Id love to be indifferent toward it, yet, does an indifferent person search a way to express themselves, even when telling anyone is too big of an embarrassment?
An indifferent person wouldn't be embarrassed at all, wouldn't be bothered at all.
Do I want to care, what you think of me, stranger?
Was it not the freedom distance that made me like you in the first place? I shouldn't feel in distress after sending a message, shouldn't worry about what that strange little brain of yours thinks of me. I never wanted you to like me, or, well, I had long since given up un just that.
We could entertain each other; have the occasional interesting conversation. And if I did something "wrong", well, who cared? Who /cares/ - two years, even less, then it's over. Even if I ended up liking you more than anticipated, that does not change the facts, does it? Even in the unlikely case, that you did take a liking of me which was made up of more than just honest curiosity and a slight, normal amount of respect, the facts stand the same, right? One and a half years, then we will have nothing to do with each other and you'll become just some weird, successful scientist in a faraway land.
And yet I still long for the days in which I thought, you looked down upon me, because if what we had was nothing [platonically, in terms of connection], then there was nothing to lose. If, as soon as I left your sight, you did not think about me anymore, nothing negative could be mixed among your thoughts.

That could still be the case, you know? Maybe you took pity, or solidarity with the person who was just sick for a while...
I just hope to remain myself when we meet again.