Dear Best Friend,

You're so confusing. I am confusing. I'm not the right person to carry such strong feelings, yet I do. It's like a curse. Karma, I don't know. But it burns. It's not supossed to look like one of my poems, but it's how I've been feeling in the past months. I love you so f*cking much! SO SO MUCH! God, it hurts. It hurts even more to know that you might love me back. That you might have fallen in love with me first. You MIGHT. I mean, we say "I love you" to each other frequently, and we actually do, but I don't want to be the person who will destroy our friendship 'cause I've gotten things wrong. Why don't you just act like the other guys? Why do you give me so much attention? I've never asked for it. I've never wanted to be friends. You hugged me first, and now I'm hugging you back. I avoid touching you long, never look when you're shirtless, can't look you in the eyes for more than 5 seconds 'cause I know I'll freak out. M, we probably feel the same thing. People see it. But if that's true, it doesn't really matter. 'Cause I can't leave him, and you'd never leave her.