Dear Nobody™,

It's cringy to be writing this. But I need to vent and allow myself to get this off my shoulders.

You won't receive this, that's why I'm doing it here. This is not for you. This is for me.

I am selfish for that, I know.

I'm in love with you. I don't even know why I am, I can't pin point the exact time or reason, but there is something about you that swallows me whole. It's suffocating. I would never tell you or lead on in any way that I am in love you. I do and will value our friendship more.

The saying "you'll never know until you ask" is false. I know you don't feel the same, I know that it is unrequited feelings. However, sometimes there is nag in my brain telling me the complete opposite of the truth. But the truth over rules the nag.

I hope this doesn't sound self revolving, but I hope we're not friends after uni. I can't watch you go on with your life, find the perfect girl for you, get married and have everyone else there. I can't do that myself.

I don't even know if half of that makes sense, for anyone who reads this. Loving someone who doesn't love you back sucks. It's fucking mean how you can get so caught up on someone who doesn't feel the same way.

Fuck feelings.